What are you holding onto?

Fortunately, the perk of writing a blog versus a novel is that on occasions like this, I can skip the gooey, weepy middle of this sad plotline and skip right to the happy ending, which is that Evan and I have gotten back together and are doing better than ever. I think we both knew that some time apart would help us see how much we mean to each other, but I for one didn't expect it to be so quick or so overwhelming. It is abundantly clear to me now that I'm the luckiest man alive to be with him, which must mean this temporary breakup was a success (assuming such a thing is possible). Even though this isn't a novel, I'm going to slap a big THE END. on this issue and move on.

2006 is over, as you may have noticed, and with it have (coincidentally) ended several unpleasant months of health, relationship, job and other woes, many of which I didn't choose to describe here. In fact, as of the past few weeks things are looking downright sunny. December 18th was my last day at my full-time job, and since then I haven't once missed it or regretting leaving: I need a more creative and positive environment than I had there. These days I'm working part time at a video game store as previously mentioned, which is as challenging as it is fun. While I'm having to dip into my savings to get by at the moment, I was prepared to do that and there are some opportunities coming up for me at this job that I'm very excited and optimistic about. I realized recently that it's been years since I've had a job I liked going to, and so far it's making everything else a lot more enjoyable with it. Funny how that happens.

The consistently eloquent danah boyd, self-made pundit of the Internets, started 2007 with a study on teenagers' use of social networking sites for surprisingly disposeable expression. [Also worth reading is her essay on Facebook's recent privacy snafu, which made TIME's look downright inane.] The trend she illustrates is that if they lose a password or access, which apparently happens often, they simply make a new profile/username/etc. and repeat the process: there's no major commitment or attachment to their online representation. Considering that in three months this journal will be six years old (for better or for worse, as these days much of the content in the archives embarasses me), it's obvious that I'm not the type to hold that view of things. But the article still left me with the lingering question of: What other things am I holding in a deathgrip that probably don't deserve that much energy? I don't have any immediate answers, but it's something I'm going to keep in mind. I think my goal in 2007 is going to be to relax and be a little more accepting of circumstances. Life is just too goddamn short. (You'd think the cancer would have made taught me that, but I'm surprisingly stubborn.)

So here's to 2007, which I hope for all of us will be the year that our fears are quelled, our needs are met, our joys are found, and we each become the person we have always wanted to be.