Two more Evil Motion Picture Fruits I've thought of: Dr. Evil, and the stuttering guy in the Harry Potter movie.

I actually had a busy weekend, and from glancing at it one would never guess I have exams this week. I spent Saturday morning with Matt and the afternoon with Luna; we rented The Emporer's New Groove because she loves Disney and is currently a digital media/animation major and yet somehow managed to live this long without seeing it. She loved it of course. Sunday Jon and I hung out and played Konamix and then I just sat on my ass for hours and couldn't bring myself to do anything. I took two or three naps and by the afternoon I was so dazed I was reading the same sentences in my Art Hist book four or fives times without even realizing it. My exam is on Wednesday and I think I'll be ready by then. I need to be, in any case. Today is my last Lit class for the semester, and I wish I could just stay home and study, but she's going to be talking about the exam and giving us back our papers and our class participation grades. The latter should be pretty high for me, but I'm still nervous about the former.

I talked to my Dad yesterday and told him I want to see Chip, his psychologist, when I get to Asheville. I saw him once before and he really helped me look at things through another perspective, which is what I really need right now. My anxiety problems are ruining both my mental and physical health, and I can't keep this up for the rest of my life. I spend so much of my energy on inconsequential things in order to give myself the illusion of a copacetic life, but it's not working anymore. Things need to change.

Matt and I saw Murder By Numbers last night, which is pretty good. Not excellent but worth seeing. Matt, though, pointed out the pumped-up homoeroticism of the killers, and how that seems to be becoming something of a trend in murder movies. He has a point. Besides being especially bad in this movie, I can name others off the top of my head: Stu and Billy were all over each other in Scream, The Talented Mr. Ripley, while definitely an awesome movie, was quite homoerotic; even Hannibal acts like a fruit. Almost seems like Hollywood wants us to believe that all killers are at their core fucked-up homos. And that makes me much less eager to give Hollywood my money.

Today was my last day of Tues/Thurs classes before exams. We had our final critique in Painting, which sucked because our crits in that class have always sucked-- all anyone ever says is: "I like how..." or "I really like..." or "I like what you did with...," or they bring up completely subjective imagery a painting inspires for them, which has no relevance in a critique. But it's over, which means only three exams left. I found out today my Art Hist exam is not cumulative, and since I got a 94.5 on the last test I am confident I can nail the exam and make an A in the course. My Human Geography exam is cumulative, but my American Lit exam is only on the latest book we've read and counts for 15% of our grade, so I know I can get an A in that class. So long as I get at least two A's I'll make Dean's List again, which I've been preoccupied with all semester.

Enough school crap! Not only did a bunch of us play DDR 5th mix for three hours tonight but my Konamix arrives tomorrow and the Tate Center is getting a fuckin' 5th mix machine (or newer) next month. I am going to bed happy. With sore feet, but happy.

"Mmmmmm. Cock-a-doodle-doo!" *BZZZZZZZZZZZZ* Thank Sara Kate for this link!

Oh for crying out loud.

FuckedCompany.com My god. This site is like reality TV for suits and I can't stop reading it.

My Konamix was shipped yesterday and should be here by Friday. Rock on.

My final exam schedule so I don't forget:
Art Hist: Wednesday, May 1, 12-3pm
Lit: Monday, May 6th, 7-10pm
Paint: Monday, May 6th, 12-3pm (optional)
Geog: Tuesday, May 7th, 8-11am
^_^ What a crappy schedule.

I can hardly believe it's the last week of the semester before exams start. Here's my current plan for the summer:
-Finish exams on the 6th or 7th of May (I still have to check my exam schedule)
-Drive to Dad's on the 8th
-Fly to Mom's and hang out from the 10th-17th
-Come back to Dad's and chill until Animazement, May 24-26
-Start my job on the 30th or so until the end of summer.
Kind of scary that I already have the entire month of May accounted for... I still need to talk to my boss, but I think it'll be possible for me to get Sunday and Monday free every week so that I'd be able to drive back here and see Matt. I hope it works out, because it's really going to suck being away from him all summer. For the past few weeks I debated over staying and working here for the summer, since either way I'm gonna be apart from people I love and will be driving back and forth. In the end I decided to head to Dad's 1) because the weather will be a little cooler, 2) I love my job and it pays well, and 3) Athens is a fun but very ugly city and I'm simply tired of looking at it.

I've been having some problems (pain, bleeding, soreness) with one of my wisdom tooth holes since last Thursday. I went to the campus dental clinic yesterday and they told me it reopened most likely because it didn't heal properly in the first place (I had them all removed in December). To keep it sterile and clear of food, after every meal I have to thoroughly flush the hole with Lysterine using a syringe they gave me. Not only is this incredibly unpleasant, but I end up having to do it in front of the sinks in the dining hall bathrooms which always nets me a lot of strange looks. -_- I have to keep it up until my check-up appointment next Tuesday. Hopefully it'll be healed by then because this has already cost me (er, well, my dad) $60 and I just want it to be over with.

For signing up to BellSouth's online bill delivery system, I've been awarded a $20 coupon to amazon.com! The problem is I never buy anything from amazon.com and I need money for other things, like food. So! Do you shop at amazon.com? Because if anyone likes amazon and feels like PayPaling me $20, I will gladly give you the $20 coupon code. I'd have $20 cash and endless gratitude for you and it wouldn't cost you anything at all! Don't you feel like helping out a poor, poor art student?

The Athens Master Choir performed Carmina Burana tonight at the Georgia Center, which was quite cool to hear live. Some of the percussion seemed to have problems with their timing-- enough that even a non-musically-trained shmoe like me could notice-- but it was definitely worth it.

I am still kind of on the fence about the whole Asian Abercrombie t-shirt issue that's sprung up the past few days. On one hand, A&F was attempting to draw cheeky humor out of a very caustic history, and furthermore it is amazing that the possibility of these shirts being regarded as offensive completely eluded their entire marketing department-- especially when one considers how dependant companies like A&F are on cultural climate in order to market to the masses. On the other hand, the protesting Asian American groups seem to be completely rejecting any possibility that A&F was trying to be funny. (A&F in fact stated that with these shirts they were trying to appeal to Asian Americans in particular.) Instead, their stance is that these shirts make A&F an evil and racist company-- which seems to me to be about as close-minded as they're accusing A&F of being. I think it would have been nobler if they had at least indicated in their protests that they understood A&F's intentions but felt the final products were insulting instead of humorous.

But what do I know, right? I'm not Asian and I've never shopped at A&F. I guess if those t-shirts were printed with "faggot" instead of grinning slanty-eyed faces under race hats, I'd be singing a different tune.

My auctions end at 5:30 today, so you had better bid while you have the chance! :3

It is around 90 degrees outside today, so just about the moment I step outside my entire body starts prickling with sweat. Don't you love Georgia in the summer?

There's not much going on right now; I feel pretty emotionally stable and I'm not sick anymore. It is a good time to be Aaron. Just about all I can think about these past few days is Dance Dance Revolution: Konamix which is coming out on the 23rd and has basically all my favorite songs from the previous mixes. As my teacher lectures on Post-1945 American Lit I am tapping out the drumbeat of "Drop Out" on my desk with my fingers. As I paint I am bobbing my head to "AM-3P." As I walk between classes I am humming "Look to the Sky." I fear that I am hopelessly addicted to DDR and when my preordered copy of Konamix arrives I will surely dance until my legs break. Oh well, it's good exercise!

Oh yeah, and my Lit paper turned out really well.

They had burns of DDR Extra and 5th mix tonight when I went to play and 5th mix owns me. I got to dance to "Look to the Sky," which is one of my favorite songs from DDR that I've heard, as well as try a cool but hard-as-fuck song called "Drop Out." And I got to teach the disc swap to everyone which was fun. As for my paper, it's due in about 12 hours and is half done. Will I finish? Will it be turned in late? Will I stop stalling and get back to work?

What I learned today: there is such a thing as green tea-flavored Pocky and it tastes, according to Jon, "like a dowel rod dipped in pelican shit."

We're doing another DDR night tomorrow and I have a paper due Wednesday which I have spent ALL DAY trying to start it, to no avail. Since 3pm this afternoon all I have managed to do is draw up an outline and write the introduction, which means I will have to miss some, if not all, of DDR tomorrow to get it done. Why am I completely incapable of finishing something unless I have a deadline breathing down my neck? Does my getting A's on the finished products justify this...?

And you know, I've been thinking about the enneagram results I recieved (below). These things must always be taken with a grain of salt, naturally, but I feel like putting them up here with no commentary suggests that they're entirely true. I differ from these results in that I am not particularly concerned with external criticism. I'm interested in the opinions of others but I'll rarely alter my own or my actions because of them. ...I was about to say that I also have a very concrete personal identity, but I just realized I have an entire blog here full of obssessive auto-analyzation which would suggest otherwise. I bet this crap must look pretty melodramatic and boring to anyone who isn't me.

SimilarMinds.com - free enneagram personality test This test is actually kind of fun, in a brutal, unflinchingly honest way. My top two results:

type	score	summary
3	20	Threes derive self worth from success in the external world. They are highly skilled at adapting themselves in whatever way necessary to achieve success. This external success driven image often comes at a price of having a personal identity and they often are uncertain of who they really are.
1	19	Ones are idealistic and strive for perfection. Morals and ethics drive them. They live with an overbearing internal critic that never rests. They are always comparing themselves to others and are overly concerned with external criticism. They can be very judgmental and others perceive them as too uptight.

Time for a link fest:

X-E - The Corey Haim Video Diary Is The Worst Movie Ever. Looks like Crossroads and Glitter have some competition!


d&p - detail and pattern Some of these strike me as being a little half-assed, but I excited to have find a blog like this and it's a lot of fun to go through. At least for me. ^_^;

Does a group of two links count as a "fest"?

I added a friends section to the blog, as seen below, and tonight I'm going to see The Royal Tenembaums. Go me. If you're interested to see what I consider some of the most gorgeous character art ever, check out Hyung-Tae Kim.

Happy First Anniversary, Crotchblog! ...Actually, this blog turned a year old back on the 10th, but I completely forgot until just now. In other news, check out my auctions baby baby!

Yesterday a UGA grad student shot and killed her boyfriend, and an elementary school principal in Atlanta killed herself in her office. What the hell is wrong with the world?

I didn't take any Nyquil last night and I slept so badly that when my alarm went off this morning I thought I was gonna cry. Being exhausted puts me in a generally foul mood... Not a good way to start the day. Things picked up quickly though-- I nailed my Geography test, found out I got a 94.5 on my last Modern Art Hist test and then quickly realized that I have a very real chance of getting a 4.0 this semester if I don't screw up on my finals. This would make me veeeery happy. :D Once I got home I moseyed to the video store and rented The Pelican Brief, which I haven't seen since I was 12 but for some reason have been thinking about often the past few days, as well as Glitter, which I immediately watched. I have not been so massively entertained in a very long while. I gotta make Becca and Monica watch it with me when I get to NC! Tonight I had dinner with Matt and we hung out for a while. By then I was so tired that everything was hilarious. We watched Greg the Bunny and the Andy Richter Show and I'll be damned if I wasn't laughing my ass off. I get advised for next semester tomorrow at 10 and I'm excited! By golly, this will be the semester I manage to score a seat in a creative writing course!

Things are looking up. ^_^ I slept for 9.5 hours last night (thanks, Nyquil!) and then slept again from 12-3 this afternoon. I spent most of the day studying for my Geography test tomorrow and I haven't really felt sick all day. I forgot to mention I got my letter from Disney on Monday and they accepted me. Too bad I don't want the job.

I guess I oughta talk about what's gone on lately, because there's a lot.

On Saturday-- more specifically, in the car ride home from Jess's as Matt and I talked about our futures-- I realized some things about myself that I need to come to terms with. When I first came to college I sensed a lot of things changed drastically in me but I couldn't pinpoint exactly what they were. But now I know one of those changes, which helps me explain why I'm so fiercely competitive, why I'm always pushing myself to do more and why my victories always feel so short-lived. It's because I have come to believe that nothing but perfection is acceptable. To be less than perfect is to not matter, and I am petrified that I and my life and my accomplishments will never amount to anything. I realize now that for the past two years I've been living under the banner "Be perfect or you're nothing." The things that matter most to me-- my drawing, painting, writing, site-work-- I'm not proud of any of it because there are people out there who do it better than me, and as long as I'm not the best, nothing I do will be worthwhile.

I understand that this isn't healthy but I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I can't live like this forever, I know that, but how do I change my deepest, most ingrained beliefs? I've never had to do it before and I don't even know if I can. All I know is that if I don't, I will be pushing myself to do the best that I can for the rest of my life but I will never feel that I've done well enough.

Since Saturday I have also gotten sick again. I've had chronic headaches, sore throats, aching muscles and mild fevers at night. My attempts to sleep at night have gone from their typically rocky state to worse. I went to the clinic yesterday and the doctor said, to my complete lack of surprise, that this is most likely caused or at least heavily exacerbated by stress. So basically I need to just calm down and pull myself together, and I'm going to try to do that.

There are some other things going on also, but I think I'll just quit here for now. I don't have class today and all I have to do is study for a Geography test tomorrow, so I have some time to myself, which is exactly what I need.

In a fit of boredom I've been cruising Madonna sites to see what she's been up to lately, and aside from the fact she's doing the theme to the new James Bond movie, there's not much interesting. I downloaded both versions of the Thunderpuss Remix of her GHV2 CD (there're radio-length and extended-length versions) and I'm just marvelling at her voice. I think I have finally realized that Madonna has a pretty standard, if not bad, singing voice. I never thought her voice was truly amazing, mind you, but listening to these megamixes of all her best songs, I can't deny the fact any longer that she just... isn't great. She hits the notes; her voice just sounds bad. But then I see pictures like this, an upcoming magazine cover, and I love her all over again.

Oh yeah, and I found out that my Human Georgraphy test score isn't 86.5/110.5 like it says-- it's simply 86.5. How cool is that? Very cool I tell you!

So! I had my interview at 2 today-- he interviewed two of us at once, oddly enough-- and he said we should be expecting a letter within a week or so. It went fine and I'm not going to waste a second thought on trying to figure out what I should've or could've done differently because there's no point. ^_^ I just realized, though, that I have yet to even so much as mention the visit by Disney to my parents. I wonder if I should wait until I get my acceptance/denial letter. I wonder if I should even tell them at all, since this was just a test for myself.

Saturday Matt and I are driving to Atlanta to spend the afternoon with my sister and bro-in-law, and I'm excited because I haven't seen her in a while and she and Matt have yet to meet. They're both awesome, so I'm not worried. Sunday we're going to the picnic of one of the gay/lesbian organizations on campus, which was really fun last year. The highlight was watching two lesbians kick the asses of a whole flock of gay men at volleyball. XD

The Crotchblog turns one year old on April 10th! What should I do to celebrate..?

I have decided my best course of action for this Disney internship. I am not going to do an internship. I am, however, going to go to my interview tomorrow and try my damnedest to score one. As silly as it sounds, I think what I need right now more than networking opportunities is simply more experience with interviews and applications. There's also always the possibility of doing an internship next year, right?

Tomorrow I am going to be eloquent, confident, amiable and just plain fanfuckingtastic so that they offer me a job which I politely refuse. I feel much calmer now what I have a plan.

I forgot to mention yesterday that I went to campus without wearing a hat for the first time this semester. Some people I'm in classes with who I've known from last semester were stunned to see I have long hair, since the last time they saw it there was hardly any there. It was kinda funny. I'm looking forward to getting my Ryuichi cut and then after the cosplay, buzzing it all off again.

Today I missed the city bus to campus in time for my class and hence had to drive and park downtown. The spaces have one-hour meters, though, and my class is fifty minutes. I waited in my car until five minutes before class started, put an hour in the meter and bolted to class, and afterwards bolted back in hopes of beating the expiration since the roaming meter-men ticket profusely. In the end I was five minutes late getting back, but I didn't get a ticket, so hey.

Tonight at Tate they had a seminar held by Disney reps concerning semester-long internships at Walt Disney World in Orlando. To sum it up, you basically live in their housing, have a relatively demanding but low-level (custodial, transportation, merchandise, etc.) and full-time job, and in your spare time you take classes, attend seminars on professions within Disney that appeal to you and network network network to meet people in your intended line of work and get your resume out. I'm scheduled for an interview with them tomorrow afternoon to submit an application. In two weeks they'll let me know if they want to hire me for a specific position and then I give them my final decision whether or not I'll to do it. My dream job with Disney might be in journalism/communications but probably in animation, specifically as a colorist. This is a chance for me to get my foot in the Disney (and simply professional) door, so to speak. And it's frightening. The work world is demanding and competitive and I've tried to ignore that intimidating fact up to now, but I know I'm going to have to deal with it sooner or later, whatever career I develop. I still have mixed feelings about this internship, though. There's the fact that I fear and resist change, and there's also the fact that I almost always adapt to it incredibly easily and quickly to it. So I'm simultaneously interested in this opportunity and scared of it. Every step along the way a little voice in my head has said, "Don't go to the seminar, it probably won't be what you expect;" "Don't sign up for an interview, you're not skilled enough to be hired;" and if they offer me a job I'm sure it'll say "Don't take it, you won't like the experience." So far I've been able to tell that little voice to shut its fucking mouth, but if they really offer me the chance to do this, will I do it...? I don't know, and of course, no one can make these decisions for me but myself.

YOU!!

Wow, Blogger decided not to post my newest entry so I guess I'll try again--

Today (Tuesday) in Painting we've started a two-week assignment of painting a song of our choice. I'm doing the piano version of "The Mystic Forest" from FFVI, one of my favorite songs of all time, and so far it's coming along alright. Everything about this day was nice, really-- the weather is finally normalizing-- except my throat has hurt all day and I really don't feel like getting one of my frequent throat infections at the moment. Sounds like an excuse for some Nyquil tonight, woohoo! Damn I love that stuff. No restless tossing, no nightmares... just druggéd sleepy bliss.

We took over the lobby of Sara Kate's dorm tonight to play DDR on the big-screen TV from like nine to midnight, and it was awesome. Now if you'll pardon me, I'mma hop in the shower since I'm nice and exhausted and oooooh, my bed is looking mighty nice at the moment.

I fixed Stephen's toilet today as planned. The screws, washers, nuts and wingnuts that connect the tank to the bowl were completely rusted out and had started to leak on the right side. I went ahead and bought all the tools and supplies and replaced both. The highlight was probably losing my grip while using a hacksaw to cut through the old bolts and spraying rust in my face. -_- But it's finished and works fine and I feel good. Now if only my dad would choose to pay me the money he'd been prepared to give a plumber...

I just had some kind of moldy ice cream and I'm not feeling too great. Maybe there's a moral in this.

Tomorrow night Sara Kate is having a DDR party at her place and I CAN'T WAIT! :D