Halloween is only a little more than a week away and I'm just now getting started on my costume: Jack Sheppard from the TV series Lost. This means I don't have a complicated costume to worry about, but I want to make sure I get right the few details there are. I just spent two hours diligently trying to recreate the bizarre tattoos he has on his left shoulder, and I think I did a pretty damn good job. Here are all the other reference pictures and such that I'm using. The biggest challenge of all is probably going to be not only covering up my own tattoo somehow, but then drawing Jack's complex one on top of it.

I am very pleased to report that I now have my own health insurance! My employee benefits have kicked in, including a Blue Cross plan which I'm still trying to figure out but am nevertheless grateful to possess. To be honest, given my medical history, having affordable insurance was a large incentive for me to take this job. Since my access to the University Health Center ends after this semester, it's a huge relief to know that I have another doctor-- and if I don't like her, I can choose another one. If only purchasing a car or a home was so easy.

It's the third week of the month, which is always the quietest at work-- excrutiatingly so. For almost the entire first week each month I'm busy putting in everyone's rent and handling any problems that residents bring up. I spend the second week sending out all my letters and notices (usually about a hundred or so), paying lots of unexpected visits and filing for evictions at the courthouse if needed. The fourth week is spent doing all the end-of-month reports and other bureaucratic tedium. During the third week, though, I know everyone's payment schedules and just have to wait for the money to trickle in, occasionally offering friendly (or not-so-friendly) reminders. I'm glad tomorrow's Friday, and I'm actually kind of looking forward to the stress of next week. I'd rather be too busy than too idle.

It's only been, what, two journal posts since summer was rolling in? This has been addressed previously, I know, but it's still ludicrous. In any case, fall has finally started here: for the past week or so the mornings have been much slower to warm, and at night cold drafts have been finding open windows to sneak through. In addition to being a refreshing break from the heat, this also means that Thanksgiving is not long off! For as long as I can remember, Thanksgiving has been as important to my family as Christmas is to most others. My Dad's side of the family, which has always been very close-knit, comes together every year back in Asheville-- typically at my parents' home, since it's gigantic and at one point they've both been professional chefs. There's a ton of delicious food, a lot of relatives I don't get to see often enough, and everyone's always in high spirits. (My birthday also falls either on or very near Thanksgiving each year, and while not very important to me in its own right, this typically means the addition of a cheescake to the Thanksgiving buffet, improving on an already perfect feast.) Upping my anticipation this year is the fact that Evan's going to come with me. He'll be able to see my hometown and meet my family, both of which had a huge part in making me the person I am. Come to think of it, the mountains should be turning some pretty amazing colors by now, too. Expect a lot of pictures!

The first of two truths is this: after more than four months of silence, there really aren't any flattering circumstances under which to come shuffling back to a journal-- much less one that is possibly read by other people. The lone standard of keeping a journal is that you, you know, put things in it, and after four years of steady updating I finally failed in that task. I've accepted this. The second truth, though, is that getting away from updating this thing for while was a conscious decision. Before graduation-- which now seems like years ago, frighteningly enough-- I was under the assumption that my life would generally carry on as it had before, simply without college in it. In what would probably not be a huge shock to anyone but me, this proved not to be the case. It thus occurred to me that I ought to take a break from writing about my life and focus instead on living it for a while. I think this helped in the short term, because I was able to let things unfurl themselves at their own pace without the insistent, stressful need to rush them and dissect their progress here.

So, for better or for worse, that’s what happened and why. It doesn't matter much, regardless, because four months have passed and I have a lot of big changes to write about!

The job, pt. I

When both of the post-graduation jobs I had lined up fell through at the last minute, blatant, undeserved serendipity saved the day. I happened to have an acquaintance who was the assistant manager of an apartment complex where there happened to be a leasing position opening up, and different facets of my last several jobs happened to instill in me almost all of the skills required for it even though I had no real estate experience. Thus, in the middle of June, I humbly began my first full time job. My main job duties were simply to show and lease apartments to prospective renters and to handle any concerns or issues with current residents. The first couple weeks were excruciatingly frustrating but, like everyone promised me, things eventually got easier and also a lot more enjoyable as I learned the right way to do things and improved my selling technique. The vaguely treacherous nature of an office environment took a little getting used to as well. These days I don’t talk about my private life with my co-workers and I do my best to stay out of the gossip, because everything gets around-- there are only four of us in the office and we all work closely with one another, so there’s no confidentiality whatsoever. In only about three months the job has changed drastically (for the better), but for the sake of trying to maintain something akin to chronological order, I’ll cover that later.

The apartment

One of the benefits of working in an apartment community is that, of course, one knows which apartments are becoming available, and can score a minor discount on one. I was using about a tank of gas a week driving across town to and from work, and I’d never had my own apartment before. Being able to move into one in the place where I worked without having to pay a deposit, application fee or pet fee (for Pharaoh) seemed too cheap and convenient to pass up, so I didn’t. I’m still in the slow process of making this place my own, buying knick-knacks and installing book shelves and putting art on the walls, but I’m getting there. I was surprised, the first few weeks, by how lonely it felt not having anyone else in the house; at times I kept the TV on to have some extra noise. Now that I’m adjusted to it, though, I wouldn’t want it any other way. It took Phatty a while to settle down in the new place, too-- especially at night, when for the first week or so he would walk around yowling until dawn-- but without the dogs around he’s become very affectionate. He usually spends the afternoons sleeping in the window, and when I walk home for lunch during the week he takes a nap in my lap.

Matt

In the middle of August, Matt and I broke up after four years together. I don’t know how he’s doing these days, but I sincerely hope things are going well for him. After we broke up I met a lot of new people and started to go out and do things more often, which was a big change for me. I owe much of that to Michael, who introduced to me to his friends and, more importantly, was extremely supportive and had a lot of great advice when I really needed it. I’m extremely fortunate to have him as a friend. (Long Kart sessions at his place have also helped me to become a serious threat in Mario Kart: Double Dash. Consider yourself warned.) I was looking forward to being single and planned to simply enjoy life on my own for a while and not worry about relationships. Then I met Evan.

Evan

Now, I have never been prone to flights of fancy or hasty crushes-- much less those over the internet. I generally take my time getting to know someone first long before the idea of dating comes into play. From the first day Evan emailed me through Facebook, though, I felt a very strong connection to him that only strengthened as we continued to swap emails. When we finally met it was clear to both of us that there was something special there, and now we‘re quite happily dating. For the sake of brevity now, expect a much longer post about all of this in the near future.

The job, pt. II

As I said before, my job has changed significantly since I first began there. This is a very large, very ghetto community to live and work in, and, for better or for worse, there have been a lot of colorful situations here. The assistant manager through whom I found out about the job has also left to join the Navy, and we’ve taken on another leasing agent in his stead. In his absence I’ve assumed some of the responsibilities of his title. The property manager recently told me that she plans to officially promote me to the assistant manager position in a couple months, once I’ve had a little more experience. The prospect is both exciting and sort of terrifying-- it would mean a hefty raise and some great benefits, but also a lot more stress and a lot more responsibility. That’s an issue for the future, regardless; as of last month, my position has undergone something of a lateral shift as well, from focusing on leasing to managing collections. It is now my responsibility to manage and track all of the rent we receive each month and to go after everyone with outstanding balances. Because I can very easily separate the personal from the professional, I absolutely love this job. I have no problem confronting people with outstanding balances and being a hard-ass if needed, it‘s simply part of my job. Also, unlike when I was focused full-time on leasing, showing apartments and doing the same thing every day, I now have a very clear goal each month (zero outstanding money) and the challenge of meeting it, which makes a huge difference for me. If people make no effort to pay, I evict them. Whenever the resident contests the eviction, which happens once in a while, we have to go to trial, which I also enjoy-- in part because I’m interested in the legal process and in part because we always (rightfully) win. The job can be tedious at times, especially when dealing with people who try to take everything as personal attacks, but I’ve been very successful so far and I hope I can continue doing it if/when I’m promoted.

Sadly, reading over all of this, it addresses the major events of last four months without really getting across the experiences of them. I guess that’s the price I pay for taking a long hiatus from updates (which, for the record, I don’t foresee happening again) and having to cram everything together. All of these things feel so ancient to me that it’s difficult to drudge them up again. If I can, I’ll go back and flesh them out more thoroughly. If not, at least they’re documented here in some form and I can move on. Thinking about the past four months and all their major changes, and how difficult and frightening and fun they’ve been, and how hard it is trying to describe them now, I think I can cover this entire experience in one simple summary: I’m now living life facing forward.